Here I am feeling as if my heart is being ripped out of my chest.  I thought I was healed.  Apparently, I'm...

I think I'm dying. Not the physical dying.  Rather, the my-soul-has-left-me type of deterioration. And it is so easy to hide it. It's so easy to say "hello". But don't let me look him in the eyes. It feels like the sky is falling on top of me and I'm unable to call for help. 

Speechless. Dying. Soul-less. Lost.

What's worst about dying? There's no going back. What's done is done. There's no "I'm sorry" and "I love you" after that last breath.